Australia- Not that Far.

I got asked quite a bit- how far is Oz from Canada? I also got asked what certain Aussie slang meant.. It takes 14 hours and 45 minutes to get from Vancouver to Brisbane direct. It would take you 11 hrs and 51 minutes to get from Vancouver to Calgary by road, without stopping. It would take you 22 hours and 53 minutes to get from Kelowna to Winnipeg without stopping by road. To get things in perspective. It would take you longer to get to Italy from Western North America than to Australia.

As far as an Australian is concerned, anything can, and should, be abbreviated. Abbreviation is achieved by taking the main root of the word and adding “ie” or “y” and “o”. Australians abbreviate nouns, names, places, anything at all!

Common abbreviations are:
Aussie = Australian
Arvo = Afternoon
Bickies = Biscuits, cookies
Blowie = Blowfly
Brekky = Breakfast
Brolly = Umbrella
Chrissie = Christmas
Cocky = Cockatoo, native bird of Australia, can also mean a farmer
Cozzie = Swimming costume / swimsuit / bathing suit
Footy = Football of any variation (Aussie rules, Rugby League, Soccer)
Greenie = Mildly derogatory term for a conservationist
Journo = Journalist
Middy = A medium sized glass of beer
Mozzies = Mosquitoes
Pokies = Poker or slot machines. Also, one-armed bandits
Pollie = Politician
Pommy = Someone from Britain, the acronym P.O.M.E. was stamped on early convicts clothing, which stood for Prisoner Of Mother England
Pressie = Present
Tinnie = Can of cold beer
Troppo = Crazy behaviour
Vegies = Vegetables

Other common words and expressions are:

Are you right? = An inquiry as to whether the questioner can do anything for you e.g. “Are you being served?” from a shop assistant
Back of Beyond = “Way out in the bush”, “in the Never Never”, “close to the “Black Stump” are euphemisms for the middle of nowhere
Beaut = Very good, excellent
Bludge/Bludger = To impose on, to not pay one’s way e.g. “dolebludger” is someone on unemployment benefits
Fair suck of the sav! : exclamation of wonder, awe, disbelief
Dead dingo's donger :
(as dry as a) dry
Turps, hit the : go on a drinking binge
Piece of piss : easy task
Kangaroos loose
in the top paddock : Intellectually inadequate
Buckley's chance :
(you've got) no chance

New Music

I am going to post new music on my blog every week. This will be penetrated with less than trendy written ramblings from time-to-time.

News- Daft Punk are releasing their album on the 7th of December. Cut Copy are releasing their album next Feb.



I like 'The Like'- Sexy British Ladies



Art v Science- 'Finally See our Way'



Cut Copy 'Take Me Over'



Deadmau5

Deadmau5 - Get In The Cart, Pig. by fuckmylife

Hip-Hop/Rap

Jay-Z - 99 Problems :: The Prodigy Remix by theprodigy

Dr. Dre & Snoop Dogg - The Next Episode (Jay Robinson Clubstep mix) Neon Steve Re-Rub by NEONSTEVE

So this is where I get my music from...so stop asking me people :)

HERRO

Girl Talk by FlyHighBeats.com



In case you didn’t know Deadmau5 is releasing his new album in December called 4 times 4 =12. His tracklist can be found at http://www.stoneyroads.com/ all the songs for his new album are on youtube already.

The Deadmau5 song playing on JJJ at the moment is here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SNXuQJo94pc

For electro/dance/DJ/mashup/mixup I go to

 http://www.soundcloud.com/ might take you a little while to navigate everywhere, but it is sweet once you know how to use it.

http://www.stoneyroads.com/ great blog which siphons through soundcloud and other sites to get some of the best music and reviews it.

http://mashupyourbootz.blogspot.com/ mashups.

For alternate/indie/hippy music I go to

http://www.thesixtyone.com/#/top/ great website with easy navigation.

For Everything Music I go to

JJJ http://www.abc.net.au/triplej/music/default.htm
I go through the hitlists etc.

Aussie Hip-Hop/Rap and Some international

http://www.abc.net.au/triplej/hiphop/playlists/   and

http://strictlybiznes.com/

Downloads

Girl Talks New album 'All Day' from http://illegal-art.net/allday/

Best Radio Station

http://www.abc.net.au/triplej/media/listen.htm?show=listen live streaming

For my Girls
Metric-Twilight Galaxy Remix by Gladkill

Tim Tam Slam and Drop Bears

Tim Tam Slam

So Tim Tam Slam's aren't actually named after me. However, much like me, they're incredibly delectable and satisfactorily cool. I feel like people overseas don't really know how eat a Tim Tam Slam. So I’ve posted this link here on how to eat them. You won't be disappointed.

http://puttingweirdthingsincoffee.com/2010/08/08/the-tim-tam-slam/

You can find Tim Tams at most major Canadian grocery stores like Save on Foods. They're a little expensive compared to the 2 dollars I paid for a packet down the road. You have to try it though.

Drop Bears.

Some ignorant people who don't know much about Australia believe that drop bears aren't true. This will land you in hospital as soon as you get off the aircraft at Sydney airport. Drop Bears like to hide in gum trees and will drop from telegraph poles at times. They are immune to getting electrocuted from power lines. This makes them the 'Great White' of the sky.

Things some Canadian's get wrong about Aus and some advice.

If you come to Aus you will no-doubt be killed in some way, shape or form by something poisonous that
your Geography teacher didn't even tell you about. I mean there are only 22 million Australian's. I wonder how many there would be if the only animals were chipmunks and squirrels?

In all seriousness, I have been home for three weeks and I haven't seen an animal that could even potentially kill me. I have, however, seen a Wallaby, a couple of Kangaroos and a brush turkey without even trying. If you come to Australia, you probably won't see something that can kill you. I have surfed hundreds of days and haven't seen a shark. I grew up on a property and saw some snakes, but unless you step on one (because you're blind) or harass one (because you're an idiot) you won't get attacked.

Australians are uncouth roughnecks like Crocodile Dundee or beach bimbos: There are these people but they're in the minority. Plus I like beach bimbos.

Foster's is everywhere: You won't see foster's in Australia. If you do happen to see it and someone drinking it, punch them. Punch them hard. There are way better beers!

We love our sports as much as Canadians like hockey: This is true. If you go to Victoria support any team but Collingwood in the AFL. If you go to New South Wales support any team but the Brisbane Broncos. If you go to Queensland support the Brisbane Broncos. If you go to a cricket game support Australia.

Everyone calls each other mate: I do call people mate sometimes. But I would never call a girl mate (see roughneck).

It doesn't snow in Australia: It does and I can prove it http://www.ski.com.au/

Before coming to Australia realise that the capital cities are expensive- especially Sydney. Don't go to a capital city and then go back to Canada and go "wow Australia was really expensive". Sydney is Toronto but looks like Vancouver (expensive, nice harbour and okay beaches). Melbourne is Montreal (culture   capital) and Brisbane is Ottawa (smaller, lots of pubs). These are the best analogies I can do.  If you want value for money get out of the cities. Fly into Sydney spend a couple of days there. See the Opera House, Harbour Bridge, Bondi, Manly, Blue Mountains then go down to Kiama or drive up the Pacific Highway checking out Newcastle (bar beach and mereweather). Keep driving North to Port Macquarie and Coffs Harbour. Then keep driving up to Ballina and Byron Bay. All of these places are worth checking out in NSW. Before you get to the Gold Coast and Brisbane. If you would rather see some 'real' Australia drive up the New England Highway rather than the Pacific Highway.

If you fly into Brisbane check it out for a couple of days then had down to the Gold Coast, then Byron, Lennox, Ballina and for an even more casual spot Yamba or Iluka. You  can also drive up North to the Sunshine Coast and Cairns.

In Australia. Do check out the smaller beach villages and towns. Do check out the rainforest's in Northern NSW and Southern Queensland. Don't fall into the tourist trap of spending all your time at Bondi, Manly, Byron Bay or Noosa (check them out but don't stay longer than necessary if you're here for a short time).

You can fly between the different Australian cities. It will cost you about the same as it would in Canada, if you don't get some sort of deal. You can get a train to each capital city. It is cheap in comparison but it takes a long time and the trains aren't as good as Canada. I don't know how much coaches cost. There would be coaches catered towards backpackers that would take you all over Australia no doubt. It may be the easiest option if you don't have access to a car.

Cost

Cars - In Australia, cars cost more than in Canada, however, our insurance is twice as cheap. I would pay about a 1000 bucks to get my rego and insurance every year.

Food - I think food costs more in the cities (more so Sydney) in Australia than in Canada, but vice versa once you get   out of the cities. Same with alcohol. Beer is def cheaper in my home town than in BC.

Clothes: Are more expensive in Australia. However, the price you see on the price tag is the actual price of the item. Taxes are included in the price of an item in Aus.

Wages- Minimum wage in NSW is $14.40 an hour. I believe its similar across Aus. Why do you think there are some many Aussies overseas? We can save in this country.

Weather- http://www.weatherzone.com.au/  is a good website. Check out when the best time to come is.

Tipping: The only time I ever tip in Aus is when I go to a nice restaurant on say a date. I never tip when I go to the bar or when I use a taxi. People's wages are higher to accommodate for tips. Some would say that this means customer service is worse. Personally, I felt harassed at times in Canada because of the overzealous sales people. Each to their own. The price you see on a menu is the actual price. If something is $11.99 it's $11.99. Its not say $13.20 after tax and not $15.00 after tips.

Phone: We have really good plans in Australia. You will never be charged for receiving a text or call on an Australian mobile, unlike Canada.

I haven't talked about Victoria as I don't know it very well. I have heard that Melbourne is the best city in Australia though.

Are Aussies fatter than Canadians?

Yes.

So when I arrived back home some things hit me. The weather was warm, everything was insanely green, the amount of wildlife and a lady. A lady who was so large she bumped into me... it felt like an assault, such was her frame. 

People are bigger and dress more daggy in Australia (prob because it's warm and people don't care). Now most people know that Australians and Americans are supposed to be the fattest people in the world (places with bigger populations not including some islands). Why?

Pros
1) Australia has a lot less fast food places than there are in Canada or the US.
2) Australian's play a lot of sport and are good at most sports--we hate to lose.
3) We have great weather- so we should be able to excercise outdoors.
4) We drink a lot of Coffee (a diuretic)

Cons

1) Junk food is cheap here. Especially if you go out of a major city.
2) Australian's are ignorant towards being healthy and how much they weigh.
3) Skinny people are often ostracised.
4) We drive everywhere
5) Our bike systems aren't good
6) While it is true that out weather is great, I think that in a cooler climate you can excercise for longer because you don't get overheated and swet as much.
6) We drink a lot of beer (I can get schooner of beer downtown for $4.10 (425ml) - its 40 mls less than a Pint in Canada. So you would be paying around $4.60 for a Pint where I live in Aus for a Canadian equivalent Pint. Although you can still get Pints in Aus but they're 570ml. Confused??

Why it's important. People always go on about why they have to pay so much tax. Part of your tax goes to the health system (hospitals) etc. The cost of obesity in Australia was around $4 billion in 2005 and has gone up. This amount includes (lost producivity, welfare and health system costs). I also don't want to look at fat people- maybe I'm a jerk.

I have done a BMI index on myself to see how 'healthy' I was, only to find out I was nearly overweight. BMI while sometimes working as a way to determine if someone is overweight is increasingly inaccurate. Every player in the NRL would  be overweight or close to it. In fact, the more I go to the gym the more chance I have of being overweight- through BMI. It can't differentiate between muscle and fat....last time I looked, a six pack didn't indicate you were overweight.

According to Forbes http://www.forbes.com/2007/02/07/worlds-fattest-countries-forbeslife-cx_ls_0208worldfat_2.html

Australian's on average are fatter than Canadians, but it's determined via BMI. From walking around,
I think Australian's are bigger on average. Canadians may lose weight trying to keep warm from the cold but I did notice there were a lot of gyms in Canada to compensate the colder climate.

*Some words are spelt differently in Aus than Canada.
* This person is fat accoridng to BMI and should not be trusted.

Roller Derby

I should be 1) Looking for a job 2) Growing my mustache, 3) Getting ready to go to the pub for Melbourne cup shenanigans. I'm going to write a blog on Roller Derby instead.

So i was fortunate to go and see roller derby in Kelowna, Canada. The chicks, I mean girls had more balls than me and it got me thinking what my name would be if, i, could actually skate and joined a roller derby league.

Now i don't have black hair, tattoos and a passion for horror films which is prob 80 percent of normal roller derby players. However, if I did compete under a pseudonym, I believe it would be Vagina8r.

On quick inspection I came to the realisation that this name has already been taken, as has beaver control. Of course, I am only looking at names that my Grandma would cringe at.

I am thinking of Rooter McGavin at this point in time.

Rules- Of Roller Derby.

"There are rules and points and strategies, but at most Roller Derby matches the only people who seem to be aware of them are the people playing. If you know someone who plays on a Roller Derby team, you should treat them like a white person who does improv. Encourage them in their efforts, but make it clear that you will not pay money to watch their hobby." --- from http://www.stuffwhitepeoplelike.com/  and no it's not a racist website. It's a satirical look at what white people adore- like Mos Def and Bumper Stickers and why.

In my opinion the sport is well worth paying for to watch. I won't actually play it because I would get run over and die but that's beside the point. In Aus the sport is growing exponentially. Google it and you will see what I mean.